The Quick and the Dead and the Stupid.

[Matri]

Don't look at me. They wouldn't let me near a rocket launcher anymore.

 

I SAID I WAS SORRY!

[Space Voyager]

LOL!!!

 

This is the best AAR and AAR thread I've ever seen!

[Space Voyager]

Do we get a Christmas update?

[FullAuto]

There will indeed be a Christmas update.

[Gimli]

I don't like the smiley that ends that sentence.

 

Edit: Wait... you intend to send us into the battle wearing santa uniforms only, don't you?

[FullAuto]

Now you want Santa uniforms?

[Pete]

It's not like it would make a difference to the aliens' already terrifying sharp-shooting abilities.

[Sgt. Strike]

I'll take power armor, if that's ok with everyone else. Also, a med-kit, and a laser rifle. Oh, and a few grenades, too.

[Space Voyager]

If you drag a Santa suit over the bulky power armour, you'll look like the original! Several Santas are bound to confuse the aliens, too!

[FullAuto]

It's pitch black. This is rarely good unless you are still in the womb, in which case, it's perfectly normal. Brought a tank this time because I think this Terror site might be murderous. "This new invisible armour is very nifty." chiasaur12 comments, examining himself. The rest of the troops look away, shaking their heads sadly.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm1.png

Laser HWP spots an alien.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm2.png

The Gods of Christmas are with us, it's just a Floater! Rejoice! The HWP spots more aliens after being badly damaged.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm3.png

JellyFishGreenClone burns a Floater, and Zombie III steps off the 'ranger to be shot and killed, ho ho ho. Slaughteriest drops three aliens in two turns, burning two Floaters and a Reaper with all the ease of Rudolph's nose imitating a neon cherry.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm4.png

A2rael Strife is caught flat-footed and killed by a Floater, and Slaughteriest's attempted vengeance goes astray like poorly-hung tinsel.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm9.png

j'ordos Zwei guns it down, lighting the target up like a Christmas tree. chiasaur12 creates an entry point with laser fire, his rifle lighting up like Christmas lights.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm7.png

 

JFGClone plays with his new toy, a motion scanner, but spots nothing but the tank and some civvies.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm6.png

St Vier gets shot, and takes no damage, like Santa in a toy shop firefight. His return fire spreads cheery flames everywhere, that eventually lap over the Floater and char it to a merry glowing red.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm10.png

 

Matri Beta and JFGClone head upstairs, looking for a good viewpoint.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm12.png

JFGClone spots motion on his scanner, calls it in, and ulairionx2 uses it to find the enemy.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm13.png

A laser in the back doth often offend, so ulairionx2 gives him two, and kills him deader than Christmas turkey.

 

St Vier, firing at a distant Reaper, accidentally hits the landing gear and spreads joy to the world (fire) a bit too close. "Oh Krispy Kringle it hurts quite a lot!"

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm14.png

Matri Beta takes out a wall in a hail of laser fire, and spots a Floater across the street. "Oh, baubles."

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm15.png

It doesn't get any better next turn, when another Floater shows up.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm20.png

Knan and j'ordos Zwei head to the right, while ulairionx2 and chiasaur12 swing around to take on the Floaters Matri Beta spotted.

 

Slaughteriest takes down a charging Reaper, cool under pressure like sherry left outside in winter.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm18r.png

"Don't say I never give you anything, ginger alien boar pig thing."

[FullAuto]

Matri Beta and JFGClone try to get eyes on those Floaters again, and are cut down like pieces of mistletoe. Harsh.

 

St Vier does it again, landing himself in hot merriment shooting at a Floater.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm16.png

"Oh, where are the tears of Baby Jesus when you need them!" He cries, as he dances out of the flames.

 

Even as unarmoured as Mrs Claus, it takes three shots to kill chiasaur12, and even then he goes reluctantly, like the elves to the toy factory.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm21.png

Knan takes a bolt as he advances and dies, folding up neatly like wrapping paper.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm18.png

j'ordos Zwei, knelt in cover, barely has time to look surprised as plasma fire obliterates cover as quickly as gratitude for presents evaporates, and then his head.

 

With three men and a tank left, it's beginning to look a lot like Shitmas. But the shooter who picked off Knan and j'ordos Zwei makes a big mistake, having a pop at Slaughteriest. It never sees the return fire bore through its eyes, the heat causing the head to explode like a Christmas cracker.

 

A mis-thrown alien grenade goes off like a massive party popper, causing everyone to flinch.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm19.png

St Vier takes two hits, resulting in three fatal wounds, but he staggers manfully on, bleeding like a stuck reindeer.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm24.png

ulairionx2 springs to the rescue, healing the wounds and topping it off with stimulant to counteract the smoke inhalation from the fire, and painkiller to chill out that borderline panic.

 

They close in on the house, and the last Floater is flushed from cover by plentiful laser fire, distracted by Slaughteriest, and shot in the back by ulairionx2. Next turn. So obviously, not the last Floater.

 

Fire from the upper floor of the house kills Slaughteriest hotly, if not instantly. That is reindeer shit from on high. The HWP spots the Floater, kills it with one shot.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm27.png

That's still not all of them, more populous than gifts in Santa's sack. ulairionx2 heads upstairs, for a better view, and is shot down, falling like a sleigh without its pilot.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm28.png

St Vier, going for it, is predictably shot, and in his weakened state, succumbs like Aunty Lynn to the Christmas pudding.

 

Now, it's just the tank. And it is shot twice.

 

And in a miracle akin to that on 34th Street, survives, to kill the last Floater, burning it so it shines like an angel on a Christmas tree.

 

When the 'ranger gets back to base, Dragonhawk Jr. is there to greet it. "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" He shouts into the empty plane.

 

"It's March." Space Voyager yells, attempting to pull the can of paint thinner away from him.

 

"HAPPY HOLIDAYS!" Dragonhawk Jr. tucks the can under his arm and runs off down the corridor, shouldering people aside. "HO HO HO! SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO BASE. WHO HAS BEEN NAUGHTY AND WHO HAS BEEN NICE. I CAN'T FEEL MY FACE."

 

The troops catch him, eventually.

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/stm29.png

[DragonHawk]

LOL!!!!!! I'll never be able to look at anything Christmas again without laughing. Thanks a lot. XD

 

Thanks for not sending me on this mission, too. What a bloodbath. Santa and his Christmas Slay.

[Sgt. Strike]

Roflmao. Cool one. At least something survived this mess. And I didn't go on this, as well.

[Space Voyager]

"This new invisible armour is very nifty." chiasaur12 comments, examining himself.

 

This is where I chuckled.

 

Zombie III steps off the 'ranger to be shot and killed, ho ho ho.

 

This is where I started laughing out loud. Literally. And this went on almost without the breaks until the end.

[Matri]

Aww man, and I never even got a chance to get used to my new body, too. Now I gotta break in another one.

[Gimli]

It's obvious this would have gone better had my schmexy mug been on this mission. (secretly thanks God for not having been sent to this mission)

 

Wait... why haven't I been sent this time? Oh and that was hilarious FA, as usual.

[Thorondor]

Siiiiiiilent night, hooooooly night,

Aaaaallll is caaaaaaalllm, all is bright...

 

*ooooohh, aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh, gaaaaaah, aaaaaarrrrrrgh*

 

* ... *

 

Sleeeeeep in heeeeavenly peeeeeaaaaace...

 

::

 

Joy to the world, the Savior reigns!

https://www.ufopaedia.org/images/1/1e/Tank_laser_cannon.png

[Bomb Bloke]

[FullAuto]

There are very few Originals left now. Gimli, Grossbeer, Sunflash, Space Voyager, sir-roosio, and Crazy Photon. Gimli and CP are the top killers, 10 kills each, and Gimli and SV have survived an incredible 6 missions.

 

Although the funding council are pleased with my performance, there is a minor problem:

https://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h109/FullAuto_2006/X-Com/alienb.png

[Bomb Bloke]

I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

[Sgt. Strike]

BB, not nukes, use KEW's, or kinetic energy weapons. I say we load up a defunct Skyranger with a ton of rock, explosives, and any useless bodies, etc., and drop that on the site. Then we use a F.A.E., or a fuel-air explosive to sterilize the area. A F.A.E. looks like a nuke went off, but no radiation, at all. Then we send in a squad of tanks, with one person, to make sure that everything is dead, and then call for on going FAE's,airstrikes, etc. until the last are ded.

[Pete]

A thrilling Christmassy installment there FA! A shame it wasn't Christmas on the in-game time too, though at this rate you'll be bloody lucky to survive that long

 

The thing I admire the most is the heroic tank - not only did it battle bravely on despite heavy damage, but it also flew the Skyranger back to base. No task to big or small it seems

[Thorondor]

The thing I admire the most is the heroic tank - not only did it battle bravely on despite heavy damage, but it also flew the Skyranger back to base. No task to big or small it seems

Yes, and afterwards, during the nuclear fallout it will surely rule supreme...

 

::

 

https://img14.imageshack.us/img14/8201/terminatorskullsh.gif

[NKF]

The magnificent little tank that could. Tank you.

 

Have we got a leaderboard on the avatar deaths so far?

 

- NKF

[Pete]

Indeed - a leaderboard is a top idea! Accumulated kills would be good too, as would highest rank reached.