 XCOM: The Musical, dancing mutons |
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  7th January 2006, 12:47am
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#1
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 Tentacle Pentacle  Group: Members Posts: 761 Joined: September 2002 From: XCOMIB Ireland Member No.: 566  |
I know none of you were expecting this, but I've managed to sneak out some pages from the script of "XCOM: The Musical" being staged by the USO.
page 7 Science Labs. ZOMBIE: Empirical data's your only man, when formulating a research plan. A soldier's death is never in vain if it makes the formula more plain. A few dozen make a better case for refining that third decimal place. They call me Zombie because I don't sleep, as I slowly struggle to climb this heap, of corpses, data points, and trials, but from the top - I'll see for miles! BOMB BLOKE: Myself, I've been making craters. I'm sure the data will be handy later, I just love the bangs, from big to small, and have made a few holes in the wall. I've turned muton corpses into roast and I've browned this lovely piece of toast. ... page 20 Armory. Quartermaster NKF addresses a half-dozen new recruits. NKF: Please observe: the humble pistol, Accurate as a guided missile, Snap shot before you can whistle. You'll be given nothing else in case you have to assault a floater base. Some say it's suicidal, true, but I did it once, so you can too! RECRUIT 1: What if we need some extra punch? NKF: Serve high explosives for their lunch. RECRUIT 2: What if supplies are running low? NKF: Club an alien, take his dough. Here's a Sectoid corpse I made. Turn it inside out - it's a grenade! RECRUIT 3: I'd prefer a laser, but I won't beg. Can you tell us how you lost your leg? NKF: Which reminds me, here's a tip: For Reapers, take an extra clip. ... page 32 Battlefield, once a farmyard. Smoke billows and plasma flashes. Some Recruits are huddling under the Skyranger and FULLAUTO is coaxing them out. FULLAUTO: RECRUITS! Youse wanna live forever? RECRUIT 1: Sir, what a noble endeavor! Recruit 2: Sir, I can't fight! I've been shot in the arm! FULLAUTO: That never did ME any harm! I once came off second best with a sucking plasma wound in my chest. But did it stop me? Well, yes, for a bit. But the point is that I didn't quit. When I was rushed to medbay after the raid I was still clutching a live grenade. Gave the medics quite a start and took out the whole dinner cart. The point I'm beating into your head Is don't stop fighting just 'cos you're dead. .... page 47 chorus line of MUTONS enter, with top hats, tails, and canes, singing as they surround TAMMY'S throne Xcom call us the green brutes big intimidating mutes strong and silent, half bionic but we've a weakness for psionics We've got no brains inside these skintight suits we may be armored hunks of meat but if you've a mind to move our feet you'll find our hidden urge to dance C'mon Broadway, give us a chance! We'll beat a rhythm out with heavy boots! -------------------- The deadly Lobsterman threat was finally countered by melee combat with power tools. -ufopaedia.org
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7th January 2006, 1:34am
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#2
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 The Smily Admin Group: Admin Posts: 2,999 Joined: September 2002 From: Tasmania (AU) Member No.: 152 |
 ...  Which straight away brings me to the question - who, or what, is USO? Are we going to be able to watch this being acted out?! -------------------- |
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7th January 2006, 9:24am
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#3
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Dances with Mutons Group: Site Staff Posts: 755 Joined: April 2005 From: Croatia Member No.: 3,529 |
That's great. For some reason, when I was reading that, I was reading it like rap. And I'm not very fond of it.
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7th January 2006, 5:34pm
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#4
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 Fire Imp - Cat? Me? No never! Group: Members Posts: 203 Joined: November 2005 From: England Member No.: 4,033 |
Jellyfishgreen - you're a sick, sick man. I like it.
-------------------- LAST OF A DYING BROOD.
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8th January 2006, 4:54am
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#5
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 Mr. Grognard Group: Admin Posts: 2,862 Joined: January 2004 From: Sheboygan WI, USA Member No.: 1,322 |
JFG: The question becomes: "Why would sevicemen or women want to listen to an X-COM musical".
 QUOTE(Bomb Bloke @ 6th January 2006, 7:34pm)  Which straight away brings me to the question - who, or what, is USO? This should answer your question: QUOTE(USO's website) Since before the United States entered World War II, the USO (United Service Organizations) has been a bridge between the American people and the U.S. military. In times of peace and war, the USO has consistently delivered its special brand of comfort, morale and recreational services to service members and their families. A nonprofit, congressionally chartered, private organization, the USO relies on the generosity of individuals, organizations and corporations to support USO activities. The USO is not part of the U.S. Government but is supported by the President of the United States and the Department of Defense. Each President has been the Honorary Chairman of the USO since its inception. The USO mission is to provide morale, welfare and recreation-type services to our men and women in uniform. The original intent of Congress-and enduring style of USO delivery-is to represent the American people by extending a touch of home to the military. QUOTE(Bomb Bloke @ 6th January 2006, 7:34pm) Are we going to be able to watch this being acted out?! Man, I sure hope not. I'm not a very good singer! *cue voice actor to step in for Zombie*  - Zombie --------------------  QUOTE(JellyfishGreen) Zombie: Empirical data's your only man, when formulating a research plan. A soldier's death is never in vain if it makes the formula more plain. A few dozen make a better case for refining that third decimal place. They call me Zombie because I don't sleep, as I slowly struggle to climb this heap, of corpses, data points, and trials, but from the top - I'll see for miles! |
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9th January 2006, 6:42pm
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#6
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 Catching the next pimpmobile outta here! Group: Chief Editor Posts: 1,790 Joined: August 2003 From: UK Member No.: 417 |
Genius. Sheer. Genius.
-------------------- Whooooo wants some WANG!?
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9th January 2006, 8:44pm
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#7
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 Satan's Kitten Group: Fan Fiction Posts: 558 Joined: September 2002 Member No.: 503 |
I'd pay to actually see this...
-------------------- My X-COM:Area 51 site UFO terrain mods, fanfic, etc.
My X-COM Fan Fictions: The Unknown Menace, Abyssal, Eulogy  |
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10th January 2006, 4:11am
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#8
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 Maverick Hunter Group: Site Staff Posts: 804 Joined: November 2004 From: Montevideo, Uruguay. Member No.: 101 |
Awesome!
--------------------   |
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18th January 2006, 12:48am
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#9
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 "SG" Group: Members Posts: 363 Joined: December 2003 From: Victoria, Australia Member No.: 1,122 |
Can I be one of the new recruits!?!?
-------------------- Weight: 2
Size: 1x1 Power: 80 Damage Type: Stun Gas |
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20th January 2006, 9:39am
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#10
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Tentacle Pentacle Group: Members Posts: 761 Joined: September 2002 From: XCOMIB Ireland Member No.: 566 |
That's about where my creativity ran out... the floor is open for additions and auditions.
-------------------- The deadly Lobsterman threat was finally countered by melee combat with power tools. -ufopaedia.org
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30th January 2006, 2:16pm
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#11
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 Sergeant Group: Members Posts: 63 Joined: December 2005 From: Kil, Sweden Member No.: 4,163 |
If someone could sing and star this I'd gladly put together a little flash for it. Hilarious! I can allready see it in front of me..
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31st January 2006, 12:05am
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#12
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The Smily Admin Group: Admin Posts: 2,999 Joined: September 2002 From: Tasmania (AU) Member No.: 152 |
Weeeell I'd be quite happy to sing my part of the script.
-------------------- |
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